Friday, June 13, 2014

To all of you who want to play the "one up" game

We all know how to play the "one up" game and among moms it seems especially popular. In most cases I hate the "one up" game. Mostly because I think it's wrong. While I certainly want my child to succeed, my child belongs to God and because of that, her accomplishments should serve to glorify God, not me.

I do have an idea for the game that I think could be productive. What if instead of playing the game with our children as the pawns spouting their achievements, we did it with our spouses and spouted their Godly characteristics? We love to say good things about our children, but for whatever reason I find that women seem to have a hard time saying as many good things about their husbands.

The thing is, our husbands good qualities are something worth boasting. It's good for you, it's good for him, and it's good for others to hear. When we speak well of our husbands to others we tell them that we value our spouse. It's a great way to protect your marriage. When you consciously tell others about your husband's good qualities, it helps you to focus on them. That's good, because when you live with someone sharing all of life's moments together, it gets really easy to focus on their weaknesses. When you speak of your spouse's strengths you also give him a boost. It's good for him to hear praise from you. It's not like saying your spouse is better than others, it's just saying that these are the things about him that are worthy of praise. It's a way of showing that you are thankful for him. I think when we start spreading the good rumors about our loved ones, it encourages others to speak well of their loved ones too. Now doesn't that sound familiar?

1 Thess. 5:11: Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

Eph. 4:29:  Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Phil. 4:8:  Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

 My husband is a protector. He thinks about what is best for me and protects me from myself. He doesn't tell me what to do, but in a very loving manner points me to see the things that aren't the best for me. He gives me a reason to quit the things I'm miserable doing when I haven't even hinted at wanting to quit. He sees what I need and goes after it. He loves our baby fiercely. He delights in her. He is a good daddy. Anyone who spends even the smallest amount of time with Cameron and Violet can see right away that he is a great father. He doesn't just love her when she's easy, He serves her when she is a mess. He is a good worker. He doesn't turn down an opportunity to provide for his family, and no job is beneath him. Whether it's waiting tables, wading through mud, sweating in the heat, cutting grass, or working in a factory, I know that he will do whatever it takes to provide for us. He acts with humility. He doesn't consider himself better than anyone else. All people are people to him.

I've never met a better man.

Now it's your turn. Feel free to leave a comment here, on fb, or just start telling others about your spouse's attributes that are worthy of praise.